Here I am, Lord...

 God has really been working on me in the area of surrender for the past couple of years. For most of my adult life, I’ve surrendered parts of my life to God but not all – not everything. I suppose subconsciously I was afraid of what it would mean to “surrender all” as the song goes. What will He call me to surrender? Like most people, I want control. To give over control to someone else is both scary and uncertain. What if God calls me to move away, to change jobs, to sell our home, to become a missionary, to give more money away? What if……? What if?

I had to ask myself were any of those “what-ifs” worth more than following God with every ounce of my heart and being obedient to Him? Was our home worth it? Were our finances worth it? What are His plans anyway? He promises us in Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Had He not proven Himself faithful in the past? Had He not comforted and provided every step of the way when I was faced with an unwanted divorce? Had He not provided for my kids and me when I was a single mom? Had He not canceled a big hospital debt miraculously when I had no insurance and needed an emergency appendectomy? Had He not provided for me and my two brothers when my father took his life and my mom was unable to properly care for us as kids? The list goes on and on. And the answer was Yes on every one of those. He had proven faithful and has been faithful in every area of my life.

So the question became, will I trust Him enough to surrender everything to Him? My answer has become over the past couple of years….. yes Lord yes. I do trust You not only with my life but with our “stuff”, with our businesses and with our children. I know that does not mean a trouble free, easy path but neither does not surrendering to You. And I would much rather have God and His power on my side than to go at it alone. There is freedom in surrender, and there is also sweet intimacy with the King.